Leading Agency Appoints First-Ever Director of Office Snacks to ‘Drive Edible Synergy’
Auckland-based creative agency ThinkAloud™ has boldly stepped into unkown strategic territory, unveiling its latest executive hire: a Director of Office Snacks. The agency says this groundbreaking position will “redefine how internal nourishment aligns with client-facing energy.”
Sasha Gribble, formerly of Pak’nSave Mt Albert’s bulk aisle, assumes the role with immediate effect. Her first mandate? Optimise the biscuit rotation calendar and “reinvigorate dip culture” by Q2. “The Monday Morning Muesli Bar Offering was stale—literally and spiritually,” Gribble told reporters while holding up a slightly crumbled peanut butter OSM. “We’re shifting to a flatter, more agile snack selection that mirrors our shift to passion-based project pods.”
Sources inside ThinkAloud™ confirm Gribble is already overhauling the bean-to-kitchen coffee journey. She’s reportedly in talks with a boutique supplier in Kerikeri that sources beans only from left-handed growers and ships exclusively in compostable jars previously used to store indie pickles. The move, insiders claim, is “an homage to the agency’s commitment to sustainability, intention, and light caffeine jittering.”
The announcement follows months of internal debate after a failed trial of ‘Fruit Fridays’, which left several staff under-vitaminised and one BCD (Brand Content Designer) curled up beside a pile of grey kiwifruit. The new snack strategy, Gribble says, will be "less performative wellness, more tactical delight.”
Talks are already underway to align snack KPIs with client deadlines. A leaked internal memo references a new ‘Crunch Rate Index’, though what it measures remains confidential. One source mentioned celery.
Sasha Gribble, formerly of Pak’nSave Mt Albert’s bulk aisle, assumes the role with immediate effect. Her first mandate? Optimise the biscuit rotation calendar and “reinvigorate dip culture” by Q2. “The Monday Morning Muesli Bar Offering was stale—literally and spiritually,” Gribble told reporters while holding up a slightly crumbled peanut butter OSM. “We’re shifting to a flatter, more agile snack selection that mirrors our shift to passion-based project pods.”
Sources inside ThinkAloud™ confirm Gribble is already overhauling the bean-to-kitchen coffee journey. She’s reportedly in talks with a boutique supplier in Kerikeri that sources beans only from left-handed growers and ships exclusively in compostable jars previously used to store indie pickles. The move, insiders claim, is “an homage to the agency’s commitment to sustainability, intention, and light caffeine jittering.”
The announcement follows months of internal debate after a failed trial of ‘Fruit Fridays’, which left several staff under-vitaminised and one BCD (Brand Content Designer) curled up beside a pile of grey kiwifruit. The new snack strategy, Gribble says, will be "less performative wellness, more tactical delight.”
Talks are already underway to align snack KPIs with client deadlines. A leaked internal memo references a new ‘Crunch Rate Index’, though what it measures remains confidential. One source mentioned celery.